A Hundred Points
by Emarye
Summary: "A hundred points have been awarded to Gryffindor and the same to Slytherin- but nobody knows why, except for two students." Or, when suddenly Gryffindor and Slytherin have an extra hundred points and everybody else is running around like headless chickens trying to find out why the points are there and who awarded them. 'S:Drarry Pairing, Rated T, Slash, Implied Smut, language


A Hundred Points

Prompt: "A hundred points have been awarded to Gryffindor and the same to Slytherin- but nobody knows why, except for two students."

Pairing: Drarry (Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter)

Warning: Hint of slash. And an overload of crack!

A/N: Unbeta'd, but still amusing and hopefully correct in spelling! Anyway, I had this prompt idea and it just… *giggle* took root in my demented mind. Please let me know how you thought it was! -Emarye

Note: It's not going in accord to canon; this is in Seventh year, with no Voldemort. And Harry made Head Boy, with Draco staying as Prefect.

Everybody was gawking at the area where the House Point jars were, rubies glinting in the slightly overflowing Gryffindor jar. Slytherin had emeralds practically overflowing as well, with sapphires for Ravenclaw and topaz gems for Hufflepuff so far behind.

"Where'd all the points come from?"

"I don't know! Who awarded them?"

"No, better yet, why were they awarded? They had to do something insanely good to get that many points."

Everyone was in a flurry- Gryffindors being obnoxious with their celebrating, and the Slytherins looking smug but a bit confused. Hufflepuffs were looking bewildered and put out, with Ravenclaws looking outraged and dismayed in various shades.

Albus Dumbledore swept into the hall, bright yellow and purple robes billowing slightly. A large red and green top hat was perched on his silvery head, and blue eyes twinkled knowingly.

"Albus! Have you seen the points? None of the staff awarded the points and half of the Prefects and the Head Boy and Girl have not awarded them; it's chaos! Even the Hufflepuffs want to rebel!" Minerva McGonagall said shrilly, but her eyes glinted proudly.

Albus merely hummed, smiling to himself. "Why Minerva, I thought you'd celebrate such an occasion of so many new points! No matter what they were awarded for- and I daresay they had to be awarded for a good reason."

Minerva sighed, shaking her head with her lips twitching out of place into a faint smile.

"Yes, I am glad for the extra points. But I want to know what they are for, Albus! So does the Hufflepuffs! And the Ravenclaws!"

Albus smiled widely, nodding to himself. "Well then, my dear, let's get everyone rounded up and I'll see what they were awarded for."

And so the student body, plus all of the staff, was in the Great Hall staring at the obnoxiously dressed Albus Dumbledore.

Albus held a scroll in one hand, which everybody's eyes were glued to.

From the Gryffindor table, one person grinned to himself with an embarrassed flush to his cheeks.

And from the Slytherin table, another person mentally prepared himself for mortal embarrassment from the school.

Albus untied the scroll, eyes flitting down the page until they alighted on the reason for the extra points. He started to laugh, grinning to himself with blue eyes streaming tears of laughter. "Oh my! I never expected such a reason, but I suppose it can stand."

Albus shook himself, and straightened up.

And he tapped the scroll with his wand, which began to recite in Draco Malfoy's breathless, husky voice:

"One hundred points to Gryffindor for the best shag I've ever had."

And then the scroll had another husky, "I've-just-been-shagged" voice recite:

"And a hundred points to Slytherin for the best shag I've ever had, too."

Everybody's heads swiveled to a blushing Slytherin and a sheepish Gryffindor. Several girls shrieked in dismay, and other just burst out laughing. And Ron Weasley looked horrified.

"Harry! Don't tell me you're shagging the ferret!"

Because Harry Potter's voice was the second voice.

And Harry just laughed, stood up, and walked over to the Slytherin table…

And proceeded to snog the life out of Draco Malfoy, who eagerly replied in earnest.

"Well-"

"It's official!" The Weasley twins laughed together, grinning madly.

"Got room for two more, fellas?"

"Because that's just got to be-"

"-the hottest thing we've ever seen!"


End file.
